Saturday, September 3, 2011

WARNING: This might piss you off

Yes this post may piss you off, be against what you believe and you may not like me anymore but since it's my blog there is no editor and no one to tell me I can't write what I want. So here it goes: I HATE 9/11. Not in the way everyone hates it - I really hate it, I hate the news coverage, I hate the saying of the names, the service at each site, the moments of silence, the bumper stickers tell me "Never Forget" (how the hell can I forget bc you keep reminding me). I hate that People magazine has a whole feature on it - aren't they supposed to keep me up to date on Kim & Khloe (on a side note - who the hell are those 2 and why are they even in People Magazine?)? I personally - again this is my blog so I get to say what I want - want to move on, keep going, celebrate life and stop crying. Last year I had the greatest idea, I left the country. Kevin and I went to Paris & Dublin for the first 2 weeks of September. It was awesome! No TVs, well no TV we could understand, we were knee deep in Cafe au Lait and croissants to worry about the news. No one was talking about it, again we didn't understand so we didn't know if they were. It was a beautiful, lovely day just another day on vacation in Paris.

This year I've decided to race on the 2nd Sunday in September. I have no tears left, I can no longer be devastatedly sad. Eric, Kenny and all 3000 others would never want anyone to sit around crying about them for 10 years. Everyone has their own story but my story is about a group of young people that were full of life and excitement and would want me to continue to also be full of life and excitement - so I am doing just that. I'll be in Sandy Hook, NJ next Sunday racing a race like any other race. I'm also racing to help young adults that LIVE with Cancer. I need to focus on the living and the good in the world. I will race in honor of my very dear friends that have survived cancer and are still here to enjoy life: Jennifer Falkenstern, Dianne Kennedy & Andy Rapuano. I'm sure the anniversary of 9/11 will be brought up everywhere - ribbons, bibs, the National Athem will be fancy I'm sure. But I'm going to race and keep Eric & Kenny in my thoughts the whole time - thoughts of them mocking me for not running faster or looking better in my kit and both laughing their asses off the entire time. I am done crying. I want to think of them and smile and laugh - that's all they would ever want. That's what I would want.

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